I think in order to work well with others you need to excel at adaptation.
With each new colleague/teammate/agency/employee you need to be ready and willing to modify to make the relationship work.
You need to make tiny adaptation sacrifices in order to please the efficiency gods.
“Aideen would be a much better attacking threat if you let her run the play. Can you relinquish the control?“
“Your habit of emailing a report every morning is driving Derek crazy, can you just do a larger email once a week?“
To explore the other side of the coin, I think it stems from a feeling of hope.
Once we feel change is possible, we can become optimistic that no matter how bad it is now, we can reach a good place.
But if we believe that the other person is never going to change then we stop investing any time and effort or look elsewhere to place our energies.
Thomas Duggan 