I think there are benefits to asking why someone is behaving like they are.
But the exploration is limited.
Through deduction and digging into their past you may well discover the root of all their problematic behaviour but you still have to deal with them now and you’re most likely not a psychologist.
So, while it may help sympathy grow inside you to find out your doubles partner was bullied as a kid, that information isn’t helpful when his rage boils over and destroys your chances of winning the cup final.
What’s more, he’s not going to want to dive into the matter with you, an amateur therapist and tennis player.
Therefore at some point you need to stop pursuing the why and switch to the how do we manage it?
Thomas Duggan 