You have been promoted because you were good at the technical stuff but now you are no longer doing the technical stuff.Someone else is.Now you have to sit between senior management and your team.From this point I see a fork in the road.You could merely act as a messenger simply forwarding on requests from senior … Continue reading Middle management pivot →

I think everyone's motivational makeup is as unique as their fingerprint.You can't assume the same carrot and speech that worked for Charlotte will work on Marie Claire.Many a time I have fallen victim to another's  assumption that what lights their fire lights mine.So, instead of assuming and telling them what they should be motivated by, … Continue reading Motivational makeup →

There's looking to always improve and there's never feeling good enough. The first one is an ambition, the second is a sickness. The former is not afraid of mistakes. They calmly incorporate the lesson into the next iteration. The latter is terrified of mistakes, terrified of being found out, terrified of others discovering they are … Continue reading Never arriving →

"It wasn't really about the dishes" At the risk of fuelling your anxiety the subtext can be helpful to consider - what is lurking behind this disproportionate anger? Is there an unaddressed elephant in the room?

The unspoken assumptions.They threaten to derail a good marriage or jeopardize a healthy co-ownership.What standards are you holding the other person to without telling them?You might not even realize you're doing it. These unwritten rules might be deep in your psyche slowly eating away at your relationship.To misquote agent Smith from The matrix:"Find them and … Continue reading Unspoken assumptions →

Why did that accusation hurt so much? All other accusations fell like water off a duck's back but that one hit home because it aggravated a deep seeded fear.

"There is no such thing as a rational consumer" + "Because the boss said so" + Spending $300,000 on a watch when your phone has a clock. = Considering the above is it worth learning logic? In a world where the majority of decisions are emotional ones would we be better off understanding the irrational … Continue reading Is logic worth it? →

It's easier to be compassionate to another than oneself.The inner critic taints all evidence to suit their own conclusion and they have a stranglehold on your train of thoughts.But another person, a trusted companion, will not suffer this bias and can offer a contrary view of reality.One that is much fairer to your well-intentioned soul.Therefore … Continue reading Compassion partner →

Jonesy wakes up on Sunday morning with a full free day stretched out ahead of her.She writes a list of everything she could possibly do that day.But not all items are equal.There are items on that list that she feels she has to do otherwise her inner critic will beat her mercilessly and she doesn't … Continue reading Slave to self critic →

There is bullying happening in the classroom. Is the teacher oblivious or are they turning a blind eye? I think neither are good but I reckon turning a blind eye is much worse.Being oblivious can be forgiven, they're probably naive and once they realize their mistake they'll never make it again but knowing a child … Continue reading Oblivious or blind eye →