Kate DiCamillo is a children’s author with at least 20 published books to date and she is a Newbery prize winner.
But long ago when she was trying to get her first book published she was rejected 473 times.
473!
Now I think there is a lesson to be learned from Kate and her perseverance.
Namely, how to deal with rejection.
Because we know that Kate did not take a year per rejection to wallow in self pity in the foetal position because she is not 473 years old.
She clearly dealt with it in a healthy manner that made each rejection a minor blip on her daily emotional radar.
Now here’s a disclaimer – I am not qualified in any shape or form in the realm of psychology but here are some assertions that I think might help an amateur creative deal with rejection like a professional creative.
The first key is to not take it personally.
Easier said than done I know but what we can practice is emotional detachment.
Say for example you have just submitted your manuscript to a publisher and instantly inside your head you start to think:
Oh my god this is it, I’m going to be published, I’m going to be famous, I’m going to be on TV and driving Ferraris.
It’s barely been a few minutes since you submitted the manuscript and you’re already spending your imaginary millions.
Thereby attaching yourself strongly to the positive outcome. Now if you get rejected it’s going to be devastating.
Instead a handy way to remain emotionally detached is by repeating Seth Godin’s great phrase ‘This might work, this might not work‘.
Doing so reminds you of the very real possibility of failure and helps you stay grounded in reality.
Next point!
Let’s say it takes Kate ten minutes a day to email off her manuscript to a publisher, what is she to do with the rest of her day?
Get started on the next one I’d say.
There’s no better cure for stewing in your own bitterness at being repeatedly rejected than a new exciting creative project.
Also, who’s to say the second book won’t help sell the first book.
Taika Waititi actually pitched Jojo Rabbit before his Thor fame but the studio was only willing to take the chance on the project after Waititi proved himself in the Marvel universe.
Furthermore if your manuscripts are getting rejected not because of subjectivity but basic mistakes then practice is the best exercise for you.
Next it’s easier to handle rejection if you don’t need it (the green light) financially.
If you are working a job that you like and sending off manuscripts in your free time rejection is easy to take.
When you’ve spent your last dime to submit this manuscript or make it to this audition you need it, you desperately need it and so to get rejected in this state would make you distraught.
Finally, if your fear of rejection is huge then you’re likely to say/do whatever you think the panel wants to hear/see.
But if your fear of rejection is small then you’re likely to take more creative risks and do work you’re proud of.
You could point to a piece of work and derive satisfaction from it.
So regardless of whether you get rejected or not you won’t regret time spent on something you’re proud of.
Hope that helps!
Thomas Duggan 